One of my clients recently told me how devastated he is because he has become fully aware that his actions resulted in the closing of a door on a relationship that he actually didn’t want to give up. Deep in his heart, he didn’t want to let go of the dream that somehow things would eventually work out.

But he didn’t act that way. He continued to do the one, big thing that would preclude the possibility of that relationship rekindling.


What prevented him from seeing that his actions had serious consequences?

That is something that I intend to ponder over the next few weeks. Because even though I imagine that I am extremely conscientious about my actions, I probably keep doing things that are creating consequeces, and I’m perhaps not even aware of it–and the only reason I can think of right now is that whatever I’m doing has more value to me than the results I would achieve by changing that behavior.

So maybe, just maybe, even though he believes that he wanted the relationship, he really didn’t, proved by how he acted. Is that true? I’m thinking about it.